The Smudge - No. 1

ilroy sat behind the enemy's lines. The Nazis were blitzing, and he was wondering whether or not their was anybody in their camp. He leaned over to his buddy, Ralph.

"Let's get their camp," he said.

"Do you think we could do it?" asked Ralph.

"It's worth a try," he said.

They moved away from the trench, cautiously into Nazi territory. "Stay close," said Kilroy. "Don't let us get separated."

They heard a bullet ricochet.

"Get down, they're firing on us," said Ralph. Kilroy leapt to his feet and assumed a fighting stance. He whipped out his gun and shot down 2 Nazis.

"I think there were only two," he said to Ralph.

"Great," said Ralph. "C'mon."

They continued on. Soon they came upon the Nazi camp. "Far out," said Kilroy. "It's deserted."

"Get the toilet paper and wrap it around the tents," said Ralph. "I'll short-sheet the cots!"

"Did you bring a bar of soap?" asked Kilroy.

"Got it right here!" They began vandalizing the camp. Afterwards, they hid in the trees and waited for the Nazis to return.

About half an hour later, the Nazis returned to their camp. Ralph nudged Kilroy, who had dozed off. "Hey," he said. "they're back."

When the Nazis walked into the camp, they looked shocked. They stared at the mess.

"Oh no!" said the captain.

"Damn it," said the Colonol. "They did it again."

"I know," said a private. "They never fight fair."

"They did the same thing to the Hessians back in the Revolutionary War."

"Why do they always pick on us?"

"Geez, they got toilet paper everywhere..."

Soon, Ralph and Kilroy tired of watching them bicker and argue. They opened fire.

Afterwards, Ralph walked into the camp and wrote "Ralph and Kilroy was here." As Ralph walked back to the trenches, Kilroy looked over his shoulder, then quietly erased "Ralph and," then followed Ralph back home.

We hope you have enjoyed this first issue of the Smudge! Join us next issue for more humorous and bizarre stories of unmitigated inaneness! Featuring "Through History With The Smudge," a brush with evil in "Care Of The Devil," a nuclear melt-down, and more! All this in The Smudge Number 2, coming soon from zoomgraphics.com!